
I have been walking with the Lord for almost 40 years. At times in obedience but if I am honest, mostly in rebellion.
In that time the Lord has been gracious to reveal a lot of things neat things to me. Some about myself but mostly about Him.
Recently I’ve been struck really very deeply in my spirit by the gravity of these words:
“And he believed the Lord” – Genesis 15:6
For so much of my walk with the Lord Jesus Christ I have remained in the quiet rebellion of unbelief.
I’ve largely lived a life of lip service. “God is good! Surely he will bless.”
But in my heart I questioned if his promises, all of them, could be fully trusted. I believed the good news of his life, death and resurrection for the forgiving of my sin but I held back in my heart a really wicked unbelief that he ever had any intentions to bless me.
I have to be honest. Coming to know him more deeply over all these years and to have seen his faithfulness and steadfast love toward me in all my ways I am deeply hurt by the stubbornness of my own heart toward the God that formed me.
Lord have mercy.
He has really had to work on me. Long and sometimes hard. I wonder if for the first time in my life I have come to be like Abraham and “believe the Lord”.
Sorry, I’m not sure why I’m sharing this other than I feel as though it’s something in my spirit that needed to come out.
Blessed be the Lord, the God of Abraham, who makes me stand. Lord you are indeed my very great reward.
“1After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision: “Fear not, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great.” 2But Abram said, “O Lord God, what will you give me, for I continue childless, and the heir of my house is Eliezer of Damascus?” 3And Abram said, “Behold, you have given me no offspring, and a member of my household will be my heir.” 4And behold, the word of the Lord came to him: “This man shall not be your heir; your very own son shall be your heir.” 5And he brought him outside and said, “Look toward heaven, and number the stars, if you are able to number them.” Then he said to him, “So shall your offspring be.” 6And he believed the Lord, and he counted it to him as righteousness. ” – Genesis 15:1-6

